full disclosure

ohhh. that's what i need to do. i need to take all of the things even the ones i'm ashamed of and bring them to light.

-i don't shave nearly often enough. sometimes i'll present female anyway because i'd rather be happy than pretty. i feel totally disgusting when i look at my body/facial hair though and i'll turn away from the mirror because of it sometimes.
-the UWA LEIKS HENTIE thing is actually still pretty accurate, it's something i'm still into, i just don't talk about it all the time anymore
-i really want people to think i'm attractive. if i post a picture online i'm earnestly hoping that people will give me positive feedback. sometimes i worry that i don't deserve it, though. lol.
-i smoke weed pretty much every day unless i have something else to do that would conflict with it. i used to think that it was possible to get addicted to weed or that at some point it might have negative consequences, but i'unno. weed has been pretty much nothing but positive for me.
-after breaking up with courtney, i realized that i don't believe in lifelong monogamous relationships. my ambivalence towards these has caused me to not actively pursue relationships and has caused my sex life to become pretty sparse(although not totally empty). however, my change in morals has also caused me to question a lot of my aesthetic tastes. my secretest wish is to just have a lot of consequence-free sex with mature, responsible people, but that's so hard to pull off normally.
-when i was a lot younger i used to feel deeply ashamed of my own intelligence and would try to hide it from people. i still do this all the time; i feel like a "weeaboo" when i display talent in japanese or an asshole when i prove somebody wrong about something.

oh, i'm starting to feel better already!~